The Voted Most Likely Tag–in which Santa suffers nosebleeds

Hello, friends!

In a STUNNING turn of events, I am responding to a blog tag in a timely manner. (RIP the two or three tags I have a vague recollection of being tagged for but never made a note of and, oh dear it has been several years now and I don’t suppose I’ll ever get around to those…) Jem Jones has tagged me for the Voted Most Likely tag–in which we spend long hours puzzling over which of our characters would be most likely to do various things (or just…say the first character that comes to mind).

Be sure to go read Jem’s post if you haven’t already–worth it for the introduction of Prince Alexander ALONE.

Voted Most Likely

“Choosing from among your own original characters, answer the below questions based on which character best suits the answer, then explain your choice.”

The Rules:

Rule One: Thank the blogger who tagged you. That would be the lovely Jem Jones (THANK YOU, GRANDMA)

Rule Two: Link to Phoebe’s original post.

Rule Three: Use your OWN original characters for the tag! Don’t use a friend’s characters or the characters from your favorite fandoms. Your characters can come from any project, just so long as you’re the one who created them. 

Rule Four: Tag at least five bloggerly friends to do the tag, as well! (Guiltily anticipating my failure to fulfill this task…)

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Most Likely to Be a Poet

Unnamed protagonist from…untitled story. (Very informative, I know.) This child. He essentially already is a poet. He sees the world differently than most people. More than anything in the world, he wants to go home, but he isn’t sure where that is. Whenever he finds himself in a dark place, he makes a game of finding something beautiful.

I look for the beautiful.

And then there it is. Right in front of me.

It is a cloud of gnats, swirling in the sunlight like living dust particles. Like little specks of stars and galaxies that have left their orbits just to dance in this perfect shaft of sunlight. They are glowing. It is beautiful.

Most Likely to Dance in the Rain

Dominic from untitled secret agent story. Absolutely Dominic. Obnoxious fifteen-year-old secret agent math genius who DEFINITELY does NOT have abandonment issues and trauma.

The first scene I ever wrote about Dominic, he was lying on the floor of a safe house with an ice pack on his head. Because he had been dancing on the linoleum in his socks and slipped and hit his head on the fridge.

So yes, I do believe he would dance in the rain.

Most Likely to Look Good in a Kilt

For some reason I want to say Mr. Wallace from Kai’s story? (I just realized maybe it’s because Wallace subconsciously made me think of William Wallace…) Mr. Wallace is essentially Kai’s therapist. And BOY, DOES KAI NEED SOME THERAPY. Kai is certain that this is all some big trap and these people have “rescued” him for some nefarious purpose–probably something involving torture. Mr. Wallace is very patient and gentle, and just wants to HELP this CHILD.

So would he look good in a kilt? I have no idea.

(Maybe it’s just that a kilt looks kind of like a cozy plaid blanket? And I think Mr. Wallace would be a cozy plaid blanket kind of a guy.)

Most Likely to Get Punched in the Face

Nicholas Claus from The Life and Adventures of Nicholas Claus + sequel. Not because of anything he has done, mind you. He’s not particularly obnoxious, abrasive, or confrontational. He is a nice, fairly quiet, very awkward beanpole of a man–but he tends to be quite accident prone. (This is entirely the author’s fault as it has very little to do with clumsiness and everything to do with unusually bad luck.) He gets hit in the face once in each book, resulting in a nosebleed both times. At this point, if I write more about him, I feel like “Nicholas gets a nosebleed” is going to be a requirement for every book.

Most Likely to Drop Everything and Become a Sheep Herder

Perhaps Prince Ewan from Four Princes (Three of Whom are Dead). That is, I think he would have liked to drop everything and become a sheep herder. Things were getting very Tense and Complicated at the castle, and perhaps he would have fared better if he had been able to run off and start a new life among the sheep. Anyhoo. Too late for that now (see title).

Most Likely to Be Found in the Library

Nicholas Claus again. Nicholas adores books and reading. He is quite the scholar of fairy tales (which are naturally historical accounts, don’t you know), and there are few things he would enjoy better than a quiet afternoon in the library.

Most Likely to Sleep Through an Earthquake

Albert from The Education of Albert Lindner. This child is so sleep-deprived. Between being a staff officer in the military, studying aeronautics, and babysitting Rosser’s kids, do you think he has time to get a good night’s sleep? (No. The answer is no.)

But if he finally DOES get a chance to sleep, it’s gonna take more than an earthquake to wake this child.

Most Likely to Steal Food from Other Peoples’ Plates

Henry from Current WIP. As a growing young man, Henry is perpetually hungry. He will happily finish whatever is left on your plate. Usually, he will ask first, but–on occasion–he might just assume that you’re done eating. Especially if what is on your plate is cinnamon cakes. (I don’t even know what cinnamon cakes are, but Henry is obsessed with them.)

Most Likely to Cheat on a Test

Sigma from Kai’s story. Hey, if you grow up a child soldier in a corrupt military and manage to retain some of your individuality and spirit, you’re going to be in the habit of breaking a few rules. Sigma is a bit of a rebel, and probably has done his share of cheating.

Most Likely to Say “Oops” After Setting Something on Fire

Hm. Depends on the nature of the fire-setting.

Vern from The Letter Game would set something on fire accidentally, probably take way too long to notice, and then say “Oops” very genuinely.

Stephan from Four Princes (Three of Whom are Dead) would set something on fire very precisely and intentionally, then say “Oops” in a way that only a super sketchy jester arsonist can. (He’s not actually a literal arsonist in the story, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he took it up as a new hobby.)

Most Likely to Open an Orphanage

Celia from Kai’s story. Celia is a nurse who helps take care of Kai after he is rescued from the battlefield. She calls him a poor dear, which, as you might imagine, is very alarming to the confused soldier child. She also talks to houseplants. She is pretty much the sweetest human, and you can bet she would open an orphanage for confused lost children and love their little socks off.

Most Likely to Run off with the Circus

Chess from The Chess Cafe. Chess is wildly unpredictable. At least, from the perspective of the protagonist–a child who keeps a strict schedule of what kind of sandwich he eats on each day of the week. So maybe he’s not that wild. But he gets restless and sometimes wants nothing more than to go somewhere and do something–something far away from his normal life. So, the circus it is.

Most Likely to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse

Anne from Kai’s story. (Can you tell this is the most recent book I finished? Clearly Kai and all his friends are still very near the forefront of my mind.) Anne, like Celia, is a nurse who helps take care of Kai. Unlike Celia, “taking care of” consists largely of calling Kai an idiot, threatening him to get him to eat, and general glaring. She has a very terrifying glare. Zombies would take one look at her and bolt.

(Also, all Anne’s friends would probably survive too, because if Zombies went anywhere near them, she would be swooping in like a bird of prey to DESTROY)

Most Likely to Fake Their Own Death

Drake from The Entertainers. Drake is very polite and charming, traipsing around high-society. He is a friend to all, though–away from home–no one really knows him. At home, he presides over a Very Sketchy Operation. (Yeah, he’s a psychopath. But he’s such a nice psychopath!) I don’t know much about Drake’s origins and backstory, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he faked his death at some point just to reinvent himself on a new social scene.

Most Likely to Die and Haunt Their Friends

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*valiantly resisting the urge to list all the characters who literally have died and haunt their friends*

(Wow, I am so rude. Why am I laughing.)

Hmmmmmm. Maybe Jackson from Phoenix would die and come back as a ghost to haunt Phoenix (his little brother). And by “haunt” I mean he would hover over him and follow him around to MAKE SURE HE’S OKAY and ghost whisper-shout at him to PUT ON A SWEATER, IT’S COLD OUT and materialize to scare the bejeebies out of anyone who even LOOKS like they MIGHT hurt Phoenix. (So yeah, basically it would be just like when he’s alive, except for the ability to spontaneously materialize)

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That was quite fun. Though, truth be told, I agonized over a few of the answers far longer than necessary, and required help once or twice.

Me: *lying on the floor, staring at my laptop screen* “WHO WOULD SURVIVE THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE????”

The Sponge with nary a hesitation: “Anne.”

Me: *typing frantically* “Oh, she WOULD THOUGH”

Which of your characters would survive the zombie apocalypse? Which of them would fake their death? Have YOU ever faked your death? Which of the characters on this list would you most like to have lunch with? Which of them do you think would be most likely to eat you for lunch? Do tell!